Dr. Freud and Siri
When you try to use Siri with the wrong alphabet she might swear at you. I accidentally left the English alphabet on my keyboard while trying to dictate in Serbian for my cousin and would like to share the result.
"That's not a faggot ass" she started, when I dictated words that mean "I don't know what else to tell you."
Another nice sentence was: "good night sick as shit" when I said "kod nas se kaže" or "we sometimes say."
It's not the only time she's done it. I will just try another random sentence here:
"Goodness bother you very kinky shit," she writes, as I dictate"kod nas padaju velike kiše" or "we are having a lot of rain."
I don't swear very often, certainly not while speaking to Siri, and never in Serbian—which I learned from my mother, who never swore and taught me a very moderated version of that language. I don't know why Siri does this. It's a bit disconcerting. When she doesn't understand she assumes I'm swearing? Why not loving kindness?
As I write this another thought enters my mind. Is this what it sounds like to all of you when I speak Serbian? What did my grammar school teachers think I was saying to my mother when I translated their words for her? Oh dear.
This effort was all in a good cause, mind you. I just learned that my cousin's grandson was born on their Christmas Day, which falls on January 7, in Belgrade. I was trying to dictate a congratulatory reply to the note.
"I am very happy" or "Ja sam jako zadovoljna" came out as "Yucca some sod the wedding."
Well, sod you too, Siri.
No, I take it back. Thank you, Siri. I have enjoyed our conversation immensely, but I will be more circumspect in my future keyboard selection.